'Healthy societies recognize mixed feelings'

A Shrieking Cactus roundup of great stuff I've been reading lately.

Hi cacti! Life remains busy, with little downtime for writing. Reading, meanwhile? I’ll never give that up. Here are some of my favorite posts that I keep thinking about:

It’s OK to not know what “side” you’re on. Photo by Nik on Unsplash

The psychological factors behind tribal antisemitism

I’ve been alarmed at the recent surge in antisemitism and shocked to see how the literary community is reacting, too. It’s so reactionary and scary! Anytime I’m in this situation—being pressured to a take side on an issue I barely understand—I end up feeling like a baffled outside observer of the human species. (This may be why I’ve always been a registered independent voter, come to think of it.)

Dr. Stacy Rubin helped me understand the current situation better, and if anything, feel less alone in my shock. In her post, she explains how two psychological concepts — mental “splitting” and the “just-world bias” — can combine and lead to the mob mentality we’re seeing now. (I’ve previously written about how the just-world bias, aka “karma,” harms trauma victims.)

Read more here:

Mob Justice On a Spreadsheet

Dressing up for doctor’s appointments? Yep, I do that.

Before a recent doctor’s appointment, I put on a blazer, some lip gloss, and silver earrings. Looking “put together” is one of the few ways I can convey to my doctor hey look, I take care of myself and so I want to be taken seriously. I’ve been doing this for a long time, with mixed results, like the time I was told I had uterine ligament pain when it was actually liver damage from severe preeclampsia. Doh.

Enter illustrator Aubrey Hirsch’s latest comic about giving up the impossible task of being the perfect female patient. It’s both amusing and depressing how relatable her story is:

The Imperfect Patient

What is the point of youth sports, anyway?

This past weekend, my kiddo successfully tried out for a local club volleyball team. The club is well-regarded and definitely a recruiting pipeline, so I found myself daydreaming about her playing college volleyball, but omg, she’s eleven! She may quit long before then, especially if we focus on the wrong aspects of it, like winning and being the “best” player on the team.

When it comes to sports, what does success even mean? To better define that, UK writer and former netball player Jo Hughes offers six tips for parents of student athletes. All very practical and useful stuff. As she recommends: “At the end of a match, you might think you can see a dozen ways they could have done better. Keep schtum. How would you feel if you got to the end of a task and your boss or partner waded in with a list of things you could improve on?”

What is 'success' for kids in sport?

Rethinking the aspirational-labor economy

Not only do creative writers get paid squat, we face enormous pressure to spend a lot of time producing online content as part of the “aspirational-labor economy” (which is similar if not the same as the “attention economy” or “influencer economy”). This might be fine if there was an immediate paycheck - but most of this stuff is done with the hope that creating a personal brand will eventually pay off.

I’m at that inflection point right now — do I want to aggressively promote myself online, even becoming a “brand,” or do I want to enjoy my life? (Answer: The latter, though that makes it so much harder to get a potential book contract If I am not hyper-online. )

Turns out there’s an entire book looking at the promises and pitfalls of the aspirational economy. The author, Cornell professor Erin Duffy, was interviewed by Sara Eckel, creator of the It’s Not Us newsletter, and I found the discussion fascinating:

“The Always-Deferred Promise of Exposure”

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Don’t Mess With Texas: The backstory

If you regularly read my newsletter, you no doubt know I wrote a recent piece for Texas Monthly magazine about our charming native tortoise, the Texas tortoise. (I couldn’t and won’t shut up about this thrilling writing milestone in my life.)

The headline on the piece was “Don’t Mess with the Texas Tortoise Task Force.” Many people outside of Texas have heard that phrase before, and assume it stems from the obnoxious swagger and state pride that Texans are known for.

Wrong! “Don’t mess with Texas” actually began as an anti-littering campaign! This 30-second now-cringey commercial dominated my childhood (and likely contributed to the fact that I bleached my dark brown hair throughout my teen years).

Enjoy! And don’t mess with Texas highways nor our tortoises, please.

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