Finding Joy: A simple concept sets my frustrated soul free
Goal setting doesn't have to be about measurable outcomes!
As I shared in my inaugural Finding Joy post, I’ve been using the Life Values Inventory (LVI) to get some clarity on how to add meaning to my life, now that I’ve processed my complicated past (and wrote a book about it).
My LVI results indicated I strongly value the environment, yet feel disconnected from it. I also value creativity, achievement, responsibility, and independence. It was elucidating to see these things spelled out so clearly. They explain a lot of my motivations — and dissatisfactions. Like how, except for four years when I worked at an environmental non-profit (with a dysfunctional boss), the entirety of my career has been spent at a desk, editing health information. I’m good at it. But do I love it? Not really.
What I love is nature. Wildlife. Ecosystems. Critters. This has been true since girlhood. For decades, I’ve called myself a self-described nature geek. But, sadly, an amateur one — as in, lacking credentials that qualify me to be a wildlife expert.
So here I am, at this weird turning point, wanting more from life, wanting to feel more connected to nature, but not sure how achieve either, at least not in a way that earns a paycheck. Many of the things that sound appealing feel either unattainable or unaffordable (such as going back to college for a scientific degree and hoping calculus is easier this time, or becoming a full-time decently-paid wildlife writer when those jobs are next to nonexistent).
It’s easy to get tripped up on this part of making a big life change — the barriers and reasons I’ll fail. Fortunately, the people at LVI have a recommendation:
You clarified your current values and made adjustments for the near future. Now you need to develop specific action steps or goals for these adjustments.
*insert sound of laptop slamming shut*
Set goals!? When I saw those words, my heart started to race. All I could think was noooooo, not “goals,” especially not “SMART” goals1. Corporate-speak applied to my personal life is a fast track to an emotional crisis: I am not a profit margin! I do not want my life plotted in Excel and trotted out in a performance review!
Oh, wait, it’s not that kind of goal setting!
OK, deep breaths, deep breaths. Fortunately, I didn’t immediately give up and cry all day (at least not yet).
Instead, I opened my laptop back up and kept reading, determined to keep an open mind. Funny how that works.
And my mind didn’t just open, it exploded – in a good way! Here’s what the LVI folks actually mean:
“Your values-based goals should be less about outcomes, which you can't control, and more about actions that you can completely control.”
Wait, what? I can just pick a set of actions and call them “values-based goals?” YES. THIS IS SO FREEING. And so anti-capitalistic!
Turns out I love ‘action-based’ goals
This has been such an effective way of goal-setting that I’ve already started setting goals (read: taking actions) that get me in closer alignment with my values without even really trying very hard. In the past three weeks, I’ve done all the usual stuff I do (family/parental obligations, day job obligations, etc), plus I:
Attended a lecture on “forest bathing.”
Bought a Panda Planner and started using it (it’s a great tool for learning positive psychology while keeping track of your busy life, and works well with LVI recommendations).
Followed up on a pitch to an editor about a climate change issue that’s transforming the Texas Gulf Coast.
Signed up for a workshop on how to pitch essays based around the themes of my book.
Notice how these are actions? With no specific outcomes? LOVE IT!
A caveat: This won’t always feel so freeing
A lot of this is fun, but it won’t always be easy-breezy lemon-squeezy. This process is hard, and at times uncomfortable—so uncomfortable I may want to give up and go back to my status quo of sitting at a desk and editing documents.
As the LVI folks explain:
“We can't feel anxious about things that are unimportant to us. If we view stress as a problem that needs to be removed from our lives, then we may also be removing areas that are central to our fulfillment.”
This one hit home on a different level, too. I’m still learning to disentangle different types of emotional discomfort. As in, how there can be discomfort from external negative causes (trauma, grief), but also positive discomfort, like personal growth. Just because I feel anxious or unsure doesn’t mean I’m back in crisis mode, navigating yet another shi*storm. Instead, it can means I’m working on something I care about.
In this case: ME.
To watch: Since I brought up my hatred of corporate jargon, thought I’d share this reel that made my laugh:
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For the luckily uninformed, SMART stands for “specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-bound.” They are wildly popular with corporations, which use them to keep employees “engaged” by setting expectations that are clear, and in theory, useful.
I love this idea of "values-based goals". People THINK they're doing these types of goal-setting, but I'm not entirely convinced. I also like setting up actions to help you feel in control -- this reminds me of intentions, which has become popular in recent years in lieu of New Year's Resolutions.
I love everything about this - and I always hated SMART goals and also KPIs. I can’t wait to look into better aligning my own values as I transition after job loss yet again.